Dog is the sixth and final episode of Series 1 and was first broadcast on Monday 14 December 2009.
Synopsis[]
A handsome stranger loses his wallet in the joke shop. Who will win over "Wallet-guy" - will it be Stevie's allure or Miranda's wiles? It takes a Great Dane, a self-defense challenge, and some partial nudity in the park to find out.
Meanwhile, the girls' planned trip to Henley Regatta leaves Miranda determined to prove she can cope in a tricky social situation, even without the help of her mother's social training. But can she do it in time? Gary is leaving for Hong Kong and his farewell party is Miranda's last chance to tell him how she really feels.
Plot[]
Stevie has found a wallet someone had dropped in the shop, after a search of it, she discovers his name, a photo of a dog, and the desire to whip out the allure to attract him when he comes back for it. Miranda immediately falls into competition with her, saying she can attract Robert Husband - a sign - better than Stevie can.
Miranda, meanwhile, has been invited to Henley Regatta and her mother gives her tips on how not to disgrace herself. Fanny comments as to how Miranda always manages to embarrass herself on social outings, usually by winding up half naked in public. Gary asks why she even wants to go, since she hates stuff like that, but she is determined to be able to get through such an event without embarrassment. Gary then tells her he's been invited to manage a restaurant of a friend in Hong Kong, after a stunned second, she tells him that it is a brilliant opportunity. When he steps away, Clive asks her if she's really pleased and she says of course not. Clive recommend she tell Gary how she feels since he seems to be looking for a reason not to go.
Stevie has, in the mean time, has gotten a Great Dane for when 'wallet-guy' returns, so that they might walk dogs together. The size of the dog beside her makes Miranda comment she "looks like a Borrower." Competitive Miranda also gets a dog, a Chihuahua, and when 'wallet-guy' does show up, there is a jaunt to the park. When an exercise in stubbornness traps both Stevie and Miranda in the park behind locked gates, Stevie easily gets through the gap and takes the dogs home, but Miranda, who slips out of her coat and shirt to reduce bulk, manages to get stuck in the gate only to be discovered by Gary. When Tilly and Fanny then show up, he heroically stands as her cover, blocking their view so she won't give them any more ammunition. She returns home finally, wearing Gary's jacket.
Miranda writes down a cogent and heartfelt plea for Gary not to leave, memorizing it, "...my heart skips a beat every time I see you, and I'd say I'd miss you because you are the one person I can be myself with, and underneath all the fear, the only person I could consider a relationship with..." but when she tries to tell him, he is distracted by the Chihuahua, Titan, and she forgets her lines, and so never manages to tell him.
At his going away party, he asks her to dance, just as a slow song comes on, and she tries to flee from the floor, and he stops her, "Miranda! There have been so many times that you've run off when I would have danced with you. You've got to stop thinking people don't find you attractive...because, you know, they do, they do find you attractive." Sadly, Stevie then manages to get the DJ to change the record, and the moment is over. Gary leaves for the airport while Miranda is swept away by a line of dancers.
Ironically, after all their talk about Miranda, Tilly and Fanny suffer wardrobe malfunctions and expose their underwear in the end credits.
Quotes[]
Stevie: Well, let us not forget I am blessed with the allure.
Miranda: Well, I could have the allure.
Stevie: No, you don't have the allure.
Miranda: How do you know I don't?
Stevie: Because I have the allure and anyone with the allure can automatically identify its presence.
Miranda: Oh, well, that's very convenient of the allure.
Stevie: Well, that's the nature of the allure, at the most you have wiles.
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Tilly: She's probably half naked in public somewhere even as we speak!
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Miranda: I'm sorry that I haven't said that I'll miss you. It's just, if I do, I'd make a fool of myself because I'd say that I'll miss coming in to the restaurant every morning. Not because of the cakes, although they do have a strong bearing,but because my heart skips a beat every time I see you. And I'd say I'll miss you because you're the one person I can be myself with and underneath all the fear, you're the only person I could consider a relationship with, because...I love you. And that's why it's best that I don't say anything.
Gary: Yeah, that's probably best, because I'd say that's what I've been wanting to hear for ages, and I'd turn down Hong Kong, and say let's give us a go.